So for those of you who have been following along with me as I get ready to go back to Panama this is just a thought I was thinking about last night. I tend to journal a lot, especially as part of my devotional time and when I was in Panama this became an area to tease me (all in good fun of course!). My friend Jordi especially always wanted a journal reading of what was happening and what I had written down. So here's a snapshot of what I was thinking about last night, just something I had quickly written and wanted to share with you guys;

Romans 4:20-21 "Yet he (Abraham) did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had the power to do what he had promised."

I love that verse, fully persuaded of Gods power and Gods character. Realizing and acknowledging God for who he is, so loving and so far beyond any idea of human capability. Abraham's body and Sarah's too was beyond the human capability to bear children and yet Abraham was fully, completely and wholeheartedly convinced of Gods capability to reach beyond that. He was strengthened throughout this process. Sometimes I want things to be easy, my relationships, my job, my future plans, and yet God doesn't work within these expectations. Beyond human capability, without God I can't do anything, especially that which he calls me too. And yet through him I'm made strong and capable but not at all own my own. Gods the capable one.

I love and I mean absolutely love the timing that God has. Now thats not everyday because sometimes I get frustrated but when it comes down to it his timing is always the best. Now here's the story;

In my third year of university I went sharing on campus (out talking with students about spirituality) and Jill and I met this awesome girl. I ended up meeting up with her the next week and we talked about faith and Christianity for like three hours until both of us were late for class. The following year (my fourth) I would run into her a lot and we'd chat and grab coffee and somehow the conversations always would come back to Christianity and her thoughts on the whole thing. It was like she was always so close to meeting God but there was something holding her back, she needed God to show himself to her. She left for Australia right after Christmas and was gone but still totally on my heart. Tonight I signed into msn for a completely different reason and she found me online. She's back in Calgary and the typed line that meant so much to me was this, "I found God in Australia Lindsey." This blew me away. The seeds that God had planted so long ago and had been being watered through prayers over continents finally sprouted. But as we plan on reconnecting this week for lunch and catching up I'm just dumbfounded by how gently and patiently God works on our hearts no matter where we are in our walk with him.

So my friends, be encouraged. We never know where and when God is at work but he is and he desires to blow us away with his timing. Seeds take time to grow, some quicker and some slower than others. But they grow.

Alrighty, so tomorrow morning our MET (Ministry Essentials Training) Team will be getting comissioned at headquarters in Langley. That's really exciting but in a way it feels like it's happening too fast. My roomate relates the whole thing to being on a reality show. We get faced with challenges and deadlines and she keeps thinking that someone is going to get voted off the island. But she states that's good because she doesn't really want to lose anyone... me either. But honestly it has been a crazy 8 days and the whole thing culminates tomorrow morning. Cool.

Staff, servant leadership, BBQ, and realizing something new;

As of the Thursday coming, I will be a fully comissioned staff member of Campus Crusade for Christ. That is something that I never ever would have thought would have happened. With going to Panama I was given (with a whole lot of grace) permission to go as an intern even though I'm a full staff member. It's definately a little confusing. Actually it technically means I'm a clergy member which is kind of nuts but more later....

Tonight all of us here at MET (Ministry Essentials Training) had the invitation to go the president of Campus Crusdae for Christ Canada's house for dinner. As he BBQ'd burgers for us and sat with us and heard testimonies from our own lives I was blown away again by the type of organization that I am going to work for. It was such an example of servant leadership. The first night we were here, our president cast vision to us on a large scale. I totally agree with him 100% and am so so excited to be a part of something so much larger than me. But the next morning he talked to our group about the importance of keeping your relationship with God a priority in our lives. He said something to the extent of "guys, you can throw all the vision out the window if our walks with God is not where our priority is." It was such an encouragement to hear that coming from our leader and bascially my "big boss man," or as he states it the "big servant man." It's really hard to put this all into words but it's coming slowly.

Time and time God is completely humbling me. This is such an amazing group of people that I am blessed to be here with and they blow me away day after day. I'm realizing that although national campus ministry may not be where I see myself for the rest of my career, I am fully committed to the fulfillment of the Great Comission and I'm here until God calls me somewhere else. I think that might just make me a lifer but really who knows??

Today for me it was the realization that this is what I want to commit my life to. There is no greater thing than seeing people come alive in the love of Christ, its such a beautiful thing and there is nothing worth more than that. All the pain, stress and worries that I may face pales in the comparison of seeing someone come into a knowing relationship with Christ. Its simply worth everything.

With all my love,

Lins